Bairdyblog

Submariners site makes me feel subnormal

 
I really wanted to like this site. Really.

In many ways, it's fantastic. In terms of what it does, it may well be the best ever. Certainly, it beat off tough competition to win its FEMA category in the recent Aussie rec ad awards.

Plus, it confirms all of my theories regarding this type of advertising. (Namely, that the more the western world becomes blighted by actual war and terrorism, the more forces recruitment filches escapist tropes from Hollywood and the games industry.) But I can't like it as much as I want, because I don't quite get it.

Admittedly mine is not the profile that would have topped the list of user journeys at testing stage. But all the same, it's a devil to get your head around. Everywhere you go is a page telling you to wait for something. When you do, the technology takes ages to load. The pages briefing the main game go by so quickly I feel like a moron for not being able to scan them quickly enough.

As for accessing the game itself, it would be easier to get a round at Gleneagles.

Then there's the detail. Even the detail has detail. Want to know how fit you need to be to apply? Here's a pages on that very topic. In fact there's even a video of a bloke telling you about fitness. And here are some illustrations of the exercises you'll need to be able to do. Not sure how to do them? Then watch one of a range of other videos. By which time of course I'm not just out of breath, but my narrative thread has completely gone out of the window.

 

Admittedly, it's immersive. And hats off to anyone trying a sell a career which involves living in a tin can, under the sea, knowing that practically any moment someone might fire a torpedo at you and blast your insides all over the barrier reef. But when I get to copy like this, I don't know whether to give a military or a two-fingered salute:

"Unseen we seek the enemy in Silent Service. We are at the forefront of national defence, we are the vanguard. With skill and resolve we conduct our training and our mission. Courage and tenacity are our greatest weapons. Against all odds, fearless and ferocious we will fight on in our charge to defend the weak."

Blimey. Just like they to used to write in Warlord.

Of course, the best proposition for the armed services is that recruits benefit from the cultural construct that all fighters are noble and desperately sexually alluring to the opposite sex. If you doubt that, see what Oz naval commander Tom Phillips had to say about girls in bikinis helping recruitment. Terrible sexism of course, but perhaps a bit of that on the web site might have helped to keep my interest.

Ads suggest online market has some way to go

Anyone who's a fan of American football, or Cheezhead, or both, will have noticed that prime advertising real-estate night of Superbowl saw the two big US job boards attempt to twat each other around the heads with big, expensive adverts. These were, of course, efforts from Monster and Careerbuilder. Here's one of a series from Monster:

And the one ad from Careerbuilder:

Of course, both have good things going for them. The Monster ads are well produced, witty and arguably could (that's could) strike some chord with the dissatisfied worker. The Careerbuilder ad has a catchy rhythm to it and a healthy dose of iconoclasm. (And it's always nice to see something Antipodean getting punched in the face.) But - oh, dear. What are the underlying messages telling us about the maturity, or otherwise, of the job board market?

Well, it's telling us that market is still prepubescent. Why? Because none of these ads are attempting to differentiate their products in the marketplace, but seeking to grow the marketplace itself. A strategy not usually - ever - associated with market maturity.

What Monster and Careerbuilder are telling us is that if our jobs suck then don't worry - we can find another one by looking on the internet. (Admittedly the Monster ad has some differentiating messages squeezed in at the end, but this isn't where the main creative energy lies.) They're not assuming that the market knows this and is at the comparatively sophisticated stage of working out which online platform to use. (This is the equivalent of Volkswagen running an ad that says: 'Hey! Ever need to get from A to B? Then why not consider buying a car?' Or maybe The Sun running an ad suggesting that people who don't know what's going on would be better off buying a newspaper.)

This isn't the Big Boards fault, of course: I'm sure they've done their research and know to an inch where the markets stand. But it does rather suggest to me that the idea of the western world now entirely consisting of discerning on-rec consumers is complete arse-talk.

Finally, here is one job board  ad that does attempt to differentiate. But does it work? I'm slightly puzzled by the fact the little monsters are um, little Monsters - is the suggestion of Trumposaurus deliberate, do you think? More importantly, where does the viewer's sympathy lie at the end - with the little monsters or the big one? All v.v. confusing.

It's a boss of a web site

Most of you will have seen it already, but it's worth putting on record what a pleasant thing studo recruitment telly-fest Here Comes The Boss actually is.

In particular, I'm enjoying the Hanson TV slots where site bossman Hanson, a puppet with a delightfully quirky sense of humour, gets up to all sorts including (in this instance) allowing Neil Harrison from TMP to spout on about employer branding. (Presumably Neil didn't tuck his shirt in to demonstrate just how down with the kids they are at TMP Towers nowadays.)

 Anyway, things that HCTB does well:

• An original site persona and tone that gives it real stand-out. The funnies are just on the right side of alternative to not alienate the big corporates or the more serious-minded of students.
• An intriguing breakdown of barriers between editorial and paid advertising - the spots where Hanson is interviewing the Enterprise Rent-A-Car mob are much fresher than any over-produced corporate schlock might have been.
• The site actually looks quite pretty.

There are some things that rankle: the writing on the business feeds could be better (there's a difference between 'new readers start here' and patronising - 'Rolls Royce Win Big Piece Of Work' is clearly the latter). And there are usually a handful of typos that one assumes should be picked up by elementary spellcheck. But generally, HCTB is probably the bossest of the grad sites right now.

Its heavy use of video raises some issues of interest to creatives. Firstly, how do you grab attention in the first ten seconds? (I find myself clicking on the next link, as with YouTube, unless something grabs me immediately.) And similarly, how good are we - really - at writing for broadcast? There's little doubt that recruitment is increasingly a broadcast medium, and perhaps, when this crunch thing becomes more of a light gnashing, we'll see more of an influx of broadcast-literate creatives in what remains of our leading agencies.

Whilst everyone else is predicting what might happen in the year ahead, I'll go one further. The RADs 2010 Best Employer Web Site gong will be won by what is effectively a TV channel, where the home page is a weekly-updated news desk, and incisive, non-flabby streamed content will be effortlessly available on both online and mobile platforms. And it'll be fronted by Philippa Forrester. Probably.

Happy 2009. Hope you don't have reason to use the 'New Year, No Career' gag anytime soon.

Hard cell

You're sitting watching X Factor when your phone bleeps. Hey! You've got a text. That's exciting - an unopened text, like an unsigned Valentine's card, is ripe with romance and promise. Will it be from your best friend? A potential employer? The dreamboat who you gave your number to in that bar back in 2004? Curiosity gets the better of you. You open it.

And, bloody hell, it's from O2! Who want to tell you! That you could win! TKTS!!! for Take! That!!! at the O2!!! ARENA!!!!! You become just a little sadder still, and the increasingly careworn fabric of your optimism loses yet another, quite irreplaceable, sequin.

Which brings us to mobile marketing. Now, mobile seems to have been the next big thing for a very long time indeed. There are four reasons I can think of why it hasn't taken quite yet: the economy (naturally); concerns that  recruiters might actually be abusing an intimate medium; the reluctance of mobile service providers to sell much other than straightforward SMS technology; creative constraints in terms of content. Possibly, there's more.

So what can it be used for? Potentially, quite a lot, but generally recruitment has thus far limited itself to SMS response mechanisms. No-one (to my knowledge) has done much with MMS content distribution, bluetooth brochure distribution or location-based look-up (although this would be a wonderful application for any seriously multi-site employer, such as a large retailer). Nor has anyone done much in terms of web-to-mobile - combining two technologies on the one creative platform. But it can be done, as this striking effort from Orange in France testifies.

The biblical-looking chap pictured is Sebastien Chabal, half French rugby international, half behemoth. Chabal is a strong, scary man. And now he's decided to try his hand (foot?) at soccer. The film on the microsite sets up the scene, and then stops abruptly - you're asked to fill in your name and number. Then Chabal phones you to enquire whereabouts you think he should aim the ball; you tell him, and he does what you say. He scores, and in celebrating lifts up his shirt to reveal a message on his vest thanking you, and using your name.

It's all very ingenious. (Although I suspect the call from Chabal might actually be a recording, and you do have to give your answer via your phone's type-pad.) Bit like that Obama vid I mentioned a couple of weeks ago, but with more Gallic testosterone. Might not work without a French phone, by the way. But. Any ideas on how web-to-mobile could work in employment marketing?

Maybe in internal comms, you could have your CEO phone people to give more information on the new corporate values or a certain part of the organisational recovery package.

In a recruitment campaign, maybe the CEO could ask questions about a thing, and then you get called in order to give your answers? And when you get them right, the CEO takes his/her trousers off and shows YOUR NAME lipsticked on his/her underwear? Just a thought.

Incidentally, I first saw the Orange site mentioned on Adverblog.

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it's a Contracts Manager in the Social Work department

You'd never have thought it, but things are sure hotting up in the Scottish job board market. If the recent revamp of S1 jobs weren't enough, here comes myjobscotland, the government portal for all things McPublic Sector. No, bear with me, please.

The site, which appears to have been built by Stepstone and written by someone with the attention span of a dazed haggis, promises much at the outset. Nice, we think when we read the intro. Public sector job marketing with a real understanding of how to leverage the concepts of worthwhile work and social value. We read about how we're to be introduced to 'superheroes' who work for local councils. We stare lustily at a humorous banner which, in good old Adam West Batman fashion, has ejaculations (look it up) in cartoony starbursts. YYESSSS, it says, with two Ys and four Ss. WOW! CLICK HERE. And we do, but that only takes us to George.

Now George is possibly an excellent solicitor. But a superhero he is not. He looks like the kind of strait-laced individual who gave up on Gordon Brown long ago for being a tad on the flighty side. Perhaps he allows himself a go at the crossword occasionally, but only when his shoes are polished and he's finished at the Presbytery. Read the third paragraph: bet you any money you need to read it three times over before it makes sense. Slowly the curtains are closing before your eyes, and you are being lulled into a deep sleep, like Greyfriars Bobby expiring on his master's grave.

So what's going on? It's clearly a massive creative non-sequitur, but there's more afoot. We're looking directly into the heart of the schizo nature of British public sector recruitment.

Public Sector ads are either great, or poo-pants, or both. At the top end you get the best briefs in the business. Coppers, firefighters, spies. At the bottom end you get semi-display ads for paperclip polishers in Bogbrushire Council.

The good are good for two reasons:

Firstly, public sector clients are less hidebound by brand restrictions. As recent victors of the Ri Fivers show, you can do nice full-image ads with funny headlines and original photography, which if you presented to the EB Manager of M&S would probably result in your getting a crate of Percy Pigs stuffed up your arse.

Secondly, this is where the emotive propositions are. Fight fires! Save children! Spy on baddies! Operate on orphans! And so on. (Although these emotive propositions only work when attracting people from outside of the job role. Firefighters don't want to hear about saving people: they know all about that already. They want to know about shifts, money and how long the slidey pole is.)

Anyway, myjobscotland should brush up its profiles.

Incidentally, regular readers may like to note that Innocent won the NORA award.

Who'd have thought.

Your meatballs need you

Just came across this fella for the Swedish Armed Forces. It was made by DDB Stockholm and it's a funny little thing.

It follows the standard procedure for all armed services/police/intelligence recruitment by setting 'tests' intended to indicate your suitability for the services. (Precisely what roles are on offer - Field Marshall? Spudbasher? - are unclear.) Obviously, standard procedure dictates that the 'tests' aren't actual tests but merely games to give some idea of the desired competencies, attract people virally and generally add engagement to otherwise dry proceedings.

So if you want to defend the country of IKEA, sauna and Ulrika, what's the drill? For a start, you need to listen to some dour martinet barking instructions at you, seemingly through a bucket. (Sometimes he takes the bucket off and whispers at you, just to throw your concentration. They're snidey like that, the Swedes.) You never actually see him, just hear his instructions, making him the only Non-Corporeal in the Swedish army. (Ta-da.)

You have to complete some reasonably challenging tasks that concern multi-tasking, memory, concentration and something else. (Can't remember what; I stopped concentrating.) All in all, an intriguing mix of the Krypton Factor, Asteroids and Simon. Goes on far too long which should be a lesson for us all - unless they're also secretly testing perseverance, and just not telling us. Which would also be snidey.

Anyway, Swedes are the theme of the week. This job board, which was reviewed on Cheezhead, has some pretty ambitious objectives, if a less than ambitious budget for design. But I can't quite work out if it's charming, or just tiresomely try-hard in an Innocent type way.

An Age of Innocents

As Ri5 reports, the list of nominations for the National Online Recruitment Awards is out this week, and they place their particular attention on the Best Employer Site category. These are pretty well what you'd expect and much of a muchness - corporately toned, nice white space, sensible navigation, diversity aware. Arguably the only problem you'll have is telling the difference between Marks and Spencer, Vodafone and Mitchells and Butlers. Although how the dreadful GCS Recruitment effort, typos and all, got through is beyond me - I suppose the scheme hasn't been that well publicised.

Anyway, the clear stand-out of the bunch is for Innocent Drinks, a sparky little site that does a number of things extremely well. For a start, it has:

• A fresh take on Employer Value Propositions (via that Polaroid format )
• Videos of leadership saying important things well
• Clear demonstration of their employment-related awards
• Repeated exposition of their ethicality, sustainability and 'naturalness'
• Attention to detail where other's don't bother- the snail-mail address for sending your CV is 'A Job Would Be Nice, Fruit Towers, Innocent Drinks....'
• A truly refreshing approach to the generation and articulation of employee benefits - in the 'Nice Stuff' section they talk about extra holidays for those who are marrying or undergoing civil partnerships, and cleverly re-brand old ideas such as Employee of the Month (Lord or Lady of the Sash) and birthday treats (Circle of Death)

All in all, an impressive effort. But whoa, let's just rewind for a moment.

It's not that I hate Innocent as such. It's simply that their relentlessly chirpy tone - the look-at-me-aren't-I-cute, Bonnie-Langford-goes-to-California tone - sometimes makes me want to punch Richard Reed and his clan repeatedly in the face with a tramp turd.

Very interesting conversation on this blog about the Innocent brand. Here, professional writers (including the voice of Innocent, Dan Germain) discuss the potential irritability of the brand and suggest that it might (rather like Pret a few years ago) be in need of an overhaul. Commenters from communication agencies report how sick they are of clients wanting to 'do an Innocent' - in other words, adopt the same faux-naive voice as a means of cutting through cynicism and turning them into brands which are loved rather than merely respected or known.

Of course, this has happened a fair bit in recruitment circles.  But like the fellows on that blog say, there's no point adopting an Innocent tone unless (a) the realities behind the brand will support it: management style, internal comms and what the organisation actually does, and (b) you are confident that the vast majority of the population you're addressing won't vomit at the sight of it and decide to put their careers in the hands of grown-ups instead.

Second-class posts

Candidate attraction now largely means job boards. There must be eleventy squillion postings on the UK boards alone. (Citation needed.) So why can't I find one that's properly written?

Last week I was looking at totaljobs - which isn't a particularly bad example, they're all much of a muchness - and browsing through the postings of a globally-recognised London retailer. Every single one read badly. There are few spelling errors as such, but plenty of mistakes that simply shouldn't be there, particularly for such an illustrious brand.

What mistakes? Hmm. Question marks bang in the middle of sentences. No spacing between sentences. No understanding of where hyphens should go. Clumsy repetition. Run-on sentences (in a posting for a Copywriter). Clumsy repetition. The same job title capitalised differently in consecutive posts. Errant capitalisation generally. Cut-and-paste laziness (which means some, but not all, postings begin with 'Job Description'). One opening paragraph which is - amazingly - 210 words long. (I counted them.)

I understand that the person writing these postings is not a dedicated copywriter. I'm sure they're a brilliant HR admin, recruitment manager or RPO consultant. And many of these errors might be down to posting systems. But things must be improved. It's not just a question of aesthetics. It's a question of your message being sufficiently compelling to lure, and secure, your ideal candidate.

Ways to improve the situation, if you're an employer:

• Get a writer (agency or in-house) to edit your copy if it's not your strong suit.
• Write to a firm template.
• Use more bullet points. (Less room to make grammatical errors.)
• Arrange for an expert to create a 'Style Guide'.

More laterally, I wonder what copy-polishing services are offered by the job boards themselves? Volume may prohibit it in some cases, but it could prove to be a USP  in an increasingly tight market.

Years ago, when we poor agency copywriters wrote 38 ads a day for the Sunday Times and Daily Telegraph print recruitment sections, we had something called the 5 Paragraph Structure that would keep us on the straight and narrow if we were tired, bored, hungover or just generally incompetent. I'll dust it off and adopt it for the current era in a future post. (Particularly because I've just googled guides to writing job postings, and they're all crap.)